John Lemanski

A friend of mine shared a wonderful poem with me, with the title “The Third That Walks Beside Me”, and requested that I return a poem to her with the same title. So here that is:

The Third That Walks Beside Me

I miss the scent of jasmine in the garden.

The wire grating that served as its ladder still clings, rusted,

To the wall of the shed.

The soil beneath has hardened and

I’ve come to accept that no one will play games here again,

In my lifetime,

No one will hide, or be sought,

Or pick the flowers and place a strand in their hair or

Absentmindedly

In their pocket, planning to present,

Like a spoil or war or of unchartered exploration,

To their mother, or favorite aunt or uncle.

A precursor to the warmth of a hug which will bury

Their face into an apron smelling slightly

Of grease and sugar,

Or a untucked shirttail, dusted by fabric softener,

With lingering hints of tobacco and last night’s bourbon.

On the walks that I take to

Eliminate my growing, middle-aged belly

(And not, as I should, to simply to enjoy the pistache trees),

I find myself reaching back sometimes,

Fingers extended and ready,

To help him along.

Sometimes, I think,

He has fallen behind because his legs are short

And his gait narrow;

Sometimes, I reason,

He has paused to admire a butterfly

Bouncing gently on a lavender bud,

Or to watch an army of ants

Busy with the transport of valuables

Back to the tunnels of their homes.

But I am alone, and I know that only in dreams

Can I hear his laughter or scold him

Gently

For falling behind.

The steps of shadows are silent and the heart

Hardens easily

Against what was lost.

Life demands continuation and

The geometry of pain says that all

Angles are equal – typically, obtuse and

Unforgiving.

As my stomach growls,

And as the wind upsets the loosest of leaves and

Carries them down,  

In invisible spirals to the ground,

I recall how each joyful action can be overshadowed, even

Wholly lost,

By the inventory of simply living,

Navigating,

And forgetting to spend any time at all

In the garden.